I don't think my chins will ever love me :(

[Chinnie25]

I've owned both of them for just over 5 years now, I have never mistreated them, pushed them too far, made them feel "small" or anything like that. I spend a lot of money on them, their new cage is HUGE and has everything they could ever wish for. They get play time out of their cage daily, get treats, always have access to food and water and toys to play with... So what I don't understand is why they don't, not necessarily "love" me, but like me?

They hate contact and I feel like even after 5 years together they are still scared of me, I have tried so many bonding techniques and none of them work .

A bit of background: I got the eldest from a friend of a friend, who did not want her anymore, so I took her on. As for how she was treated in her previous care I'm unware of. I'm guessing they didn't understand how to look after chinchillas properly because they had no idea she was pregnant (and I found out a few days of having her). Her baby has been with me since he was born, and he was social when he was a kit, but now he's just as timid as his mother.. Can't help but feel like I'm a rubbish chinchilla mom

 

[Shenanigans]

I'm not a chin expert by any means-I'm trying to learn as much as I can. I know from the wonderful people here that some chins aren't ever going to be as cuddly as you may want. Some chins are going to run up and socialize with their person, others aren't going to be as outgoing. They each have their own personalities. Maybe your chin does love you-this is just thier way of expressing it? I was blessed that my first (and so far only) chin is very outgoing and that we suit each other very well
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I don't really know you or your situation, so sorry if this next stuff is off the mark. How much time do you spend with your chin? Do you sit in the chin play area the whole hour or so of playtime? Sitting and spending quality quiet time can do wonders for the bond between owner and chin. I got my little guy to trust me by being a bookworm I constantly sit in an accessible area with him to just read. We have playtime together and when he settles down I pull out a book. Yuki typically goes back in his cage and occasionally comes out to check if he's able to sneak up and chew my book yet (he has a thing about not being allowed to chew books, and i have a thing about chewed up books). But there are plenty of days I've spent hours leaned up against the side of his cage or in an area he can access me. He got used to me by coming to me on his terms.
Also, how are you with other animals? I have a rather jumpy friend who seems to move quicker and she's not good with animals because she can't quiet down.

 

[Chinnie25]

Hey thanks for the reply


I sit with them every day while they come our their cage, and I talk to them whenever I enter the room or leave the room. They do come over to me when I open the door (for treats no doubt) but soon run off once they see I have nothing for them, greedy greedy.

They climb on me from time to time when they're out, I just feel like I'm not giving them what they need by ways of social bonds.

I have two dogs which are crazy about me, and I have also owned 5 rats in the past, who were also like my best buddies. So I feel like a failure right now cause of the whole social situation between me and my chins. I'm crazy about animals and always put them first, even before myself. Living at home instead of living at Uni so I can take care of them, I don't trust anyone else to meet their needs

 

[TheBoles]

I know exactly how you feel. We got our chins about 8 months ago and I think they still hate me unless I have a treat to offer. They came from a pet store so I don't think they were handled much or treated great. Sorry I have no advice to offer, just wanted you to know you weren't alone. Let me know if you find any new ways to bond.

 

[Burnt Offering]

I think its possible we expect to much. I have two Chins. IMO they are very social but we are talking Chins here so just what does that mean? They both come up on my lap and will let me pet them when they are out for play time. One is just like a little dog. She LOVES it when I rub her belly and scratch her behind the ears. Man she just leans into it! By nature they are scared of EVERYTHING and perceive all things as a threat to them so when this happens I consider this a very social Chin. Honestly I don't expect them to run up to me and shower me with hugs and kisses. The rest of the time they are in their cage and for the most part act like they could care less about me. But when they are out they actually ACT like they like me. I consider this success.
I am a relatively new Chin owner. About a year and a half and I don't claim to know everything. But I have done MOUNTAINS of research and it has really helped me understand the Chinchilla disposition so to speak. I love the whole experience. I love cleaning their cage, watching their goofy facial expressions, letting them out for playtime and watching them bounce off the walls, just basically everything. If I get some bonding out of it that's just icing on the cake. The other day my wife informed me I have spent over 1k dollars on my Chins since the first of the year so I know for sure they are not neglected.

 

[Amphy64]

I'm lucky in that my chin is very friendly, but he's not as cuddly when he's out, he'll climb on me but most of the time is a bit worried in case I'm going to pick him up and put him back in his cage if I go to touch him. Maybe your two could get more used to being touched when they're in their cage? I'd sit by the cage quietly, and just talk to them for some time, with your hand in the cage provided it doesn't stress them. Perhaps also use a treat like rolled oats, that will take a while for them to eat from the palm of your hand. Then I guess see if you can progress to touching behind their ears, then to skritching.

If they'll climb on you and come to you, then they do trust you, I think. It's just how chins can be, they're just not as cuddly as some pets.

 

[Bundalo]

We have 7 chins, and they've been in our family from 3 to 7 years, and each and every one of them not only each took different amounts of time to get used to us, but also have distinctly different personalities.

The first and oldest, C.C., took about a month and a half before she'd come up to us. after that period, she took different amounts of time to be comfortable around each family member. She still doesn't care to be held, but some lap climbing and scritches are a daily must.

Her daughter, Sorpresa, was born underweight and spent much of her baby period being handheld and hand fed. She isn't keen on being grabbed, but has no problem being held, so if she crawls into your hands, you know she's good with you.

Pikka-Char is the most people-friendly chin we have if he decides he likes you. We've had him for three years, and he will spend all his playtime on your lap if you let him. while he doesn't like being petted, behind the ears scritches are A-OK by him.

Cash is the next most people friendly, and has been with us for four years. While he doesn't like being held in the least, he'll happily sit on your shoulder or head for minutes at a time, and is also quite capable of performing a few tricks, even without treat rewards. Now, he'll deign to walk onto your hand when it's time to come out and play, but only so long as it's just to put him on the floor. Hold him a second too long, and he'll jump, which has led to a scare or two.

Tweak...well, tweak is sweet but incredibly skittish. We've had her for four years, and she utterly loathes being picked up or held. She'll come right up to you, hop on your lap, and let you scritch her nose, but touch anywhere else or move a little too quickly, and she's gone in a flash.

Scrat, another of our skittish ones, is just fine with lap time and loooooves scritches, but trying to hold him is like trying to hold the wind. Oh, when you do get a hold of him, he's not twitchy or scared, doesn't have a racing heart or anything, but to him the chase is a game.

Zeus, who's been with us as long as scrat, well, he's a complete sucker for scritches, wherever and whenever he can get them. While cautious, his curiosity quickly overrides his caution when it's clear you're not making sudden movements or loud noises.

Point is, the only ones that can be considered at all cuddly of our 7 are Pikka and Sorpresa, and one was born into our family while the other was one of the many rescues. It just seems entirely up to their own personalities. Were I blindfolded, I could probably tell which ones were playing in the room with me at any given time. So, don't take it personally, they are who they are.

 

[PetoftheDay]

I am sure they love you in their own way. They are about as different from dogs as a fellow furry quadruped can be, but I am sure they do love you! They just seem to be on the shy end of the spectrum - but that is fine, some just are!

Think of humans you know. In my house are me - who will hug a complete stranger from time to time, and has no qualms about hugging, touching, shaking hands - though hugs are better ... and my husband, who winces even if his own mother hugs him! (I think of us as two ends of the bell curve o humanity!) Your chines sound like my beloved husband, and your dogs like me!

 

[fuji9991]

I don't think Mrs. Wiggle Whiskers really fully trusted me until she was about 9 or 10. I always saw videos of people giving their chinchillas rubs and holding them and she wasn't like that at all. If I made a quiet sound or shuffled she was off scurrying. Then after about 9 or 10 she started sitting in my lap and not running away when I touch her. She loves chin rubs now and doesn't mind being held I can even rub her ears without her protesting much.

To me its always been rewarding. I mean a chin being around us would be like us being owned by a giant fire breathing dragon that wanted to cuddle. Earning the trust of a chin can take years sometimes even a decade but once you earn that trust consider yourseld a special person indeed.