Moms with infants!!!

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CTChin

CTChin

defender of all animals
Joined
Jan 29, 2009
Messages
646
Location
Conn.
....grandmas too :)

My first grandchild may be arriving as early as monday or tues (daughter may be induced). She'll be staying with me for a bit afterward.

A lot has changed since I was a mom 21 years ago. Babies now have to sleep on their backs due to the risk of sids (?). Are babies comfortable on their back? Do they seem to go into deep sleep? Are the swaddlers helpful? HELP lol.

Also...no bumpers allowed in the cribs now due to the risk of strangulation? Why do they sell that stuff if they are not safe!
 
I have a 4 year old and an 8 year old... I'll confess that I left the bumper in the crib for both of them. I honestly don't see how they could get strangled in that. Some babies like to be swaddled, but mine never did. If your grandchild does like to be swaddled, they make some pretty cool blankets now with fasteners in them so the swaddling stays put. I always put my babies to sleep on their backs but they often end up on their sides, and when they got older, even on their bellies. As my pediatrician said, most babies haven't read The Book telling them what they should and shouldn't be doing!

Hope your daughter has a safe delivery and congratulations on your first grandchild!!
 
I would suggest using a pacifier. Babies who use pacifiers dont seem to fall into such a deep sleep. Also never smoke around a baby or any child for that matter as this increases the chances of SIDS. I used a pacifer with all of my children and they really work. If you watch a baby that is used to having a pacifier, when they sleep if the pacifier begins to fall out they will almost always start sucking again lol. It gave me peace of mind that they werent in a deep deep sleep. Also they make safer alternatives to bumper pads now called crib sheild systems. You should look into those. I have never used one but they may interest you. Relax and enjoy your new bundle of joy. Congratulations grandma:)
 
Becca, I'm going to TOTALLY disagree with that statement. So many people rely on pacifiers these days, it's horrible. Keith's mom watches a baby (she's about 4 months old now) and they've never given her a pacifier and she is the happiest, most content baby I've ever seen. She sleeps fine, and you don't have to worry about screaming/crying when the pacifier gets spit out or lost as she otherwise amuses herself already. I had the pleasure of watching her a few times while Celeste needed to do some other stuff. I personally think pacifiers put way too much of a start on "oral fixations". If you teach a child that young that they always need something in their mouth, then you get the issue of other "oral fixations" later.

Honestly, and I may get jumped on for this, but when I have kids, I plan on taking my advice from my mom and grandmothers. What they did worked perfectly fine, and my sisters and I are all healthy, as are my aunt and uncles. I'd say with just go with what feels natural and seems right to you, CTs and congrats on the grandbaby!
 
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Ash it's fine to disagree with me. The American Academy of Pediactrics does recommend using pacifiers but in the end it's all up to the parents. I was just giving my two cents lol
 
Haha np. I just didn't want you to think I was picking on berating. I myself don't have kids, I just know my experience with baby sitting and such. I'm sure once I have a kid, my opinion may very well change. But I also think some of the "powers that be" go way overboard in their "cans, can'ts, shoulds, and shouldn'ts".
 
They do sell "positioners" to help the baby sleep on their side. also during the day when a bit older give them belly time, so they can lay on their belly a bit, supervised of course.
only reason i mention all this is because i was so neurotic with my son about sleeping on his back that he skull is much flatter in the back than it is supposed to be. and that is one of the things that can happen if they are on their back too much. they even have baby helmets to prevent this from happening! i talked to my dr when he was little about it and they told me to make sure he was put in many positions during awake time so he wasnt on his back so much, but the damage was already done. i feel so bad about it, he will be 9 on wednesday. it isn't THAT noticable, until you stand him next to someone with a very large round skull!
 
They say back to sleep because it is less likely to die from sids. The problem with tummy sleeping is that they DO fall into a deep sleep, sometimes too deep which ends up resulting in sids. Remy always slept on his side, and now that he is older he sleeps on his tummy too. Remy never took binkies, only preferred the real thing. He also didn't like to be swaddled either, but for babys who do like it, it helps them sleep. Also, bumpers are okay until they are old enough to roll. There are also mesh bumpers, so if they roll into it, they can still breathe.
 
of course, you can decide you are definitely for or against binkies, but baby might disagree! like remy, my kids were never interested in binkies, only wanted the real thing. the good thing about having a baby who will take a pacifier is being able to soothe them when mom isn't around. my youngest would never take a bottle or binkie, only wanted the boob, which made it very difficult when my husband was watching her! if i had to do it over again, (and i might!) i would make sure the baby had at least one bottle a day, so she was used to bottle feeding.

be careful what you say ash-- i think i ended up eating my words a lot of the time as far as how i would parent when i had kids!;)
 
cintistatern2005 said:
I just wanted to say congrats grandma!! But I honestly can't answer you questions, sorry no kids for me!!
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Thank you!

Thanks for all the great answers. Definitely no smoking around the baby. We are all non smokers.

I saw the positioners and thought they were a great idea but I wasn't sure if they were completely safe. They look so comfy.

I think we will try the swaddlers we saw in Target.

My daughter wants to avoid pacifiers if possible but has them on standby LOL

I think we'll try the bumpers but keep them tied tight. Everyone I know has them too.
 
Congrats on becoming a Grandma! Have you decided what you want to be called yet? Nana? Granny? Are you having a granddaughter or grandson?

My son was never comfortable on his back, and wouldn't sleep on his back unless being held. By the time he was 8 weeks old, he was sleeping on his tummy. There is a risk of SIDS associated with this, but my baby wouldn't sleep any other way.

From what I understand, the rule about bumpers in a crib is no bumpers until baby is old enough to roll over? Someone correct me if I am wrong.

momenteller said:
be careful what you say ash-- i think i ended up eating my words a lot of the time as far as how i would parent when i had kids!;)
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Ditto that... lol. I got pregnant with my son during my labor and delivery clinicals in nursing school. I thought I knew it all! Man... have I ate my words! LOL After a few weeks of no sleep, I would have done absolutely anything to get just a few hours of undisturbed rest!
 
Ash said:
Becca, I'm going to TOTALLY disagree with that statement. So many people rely on pacifiers these days, it's horrible. Keith's mom watches a baby (she's about 4 months old now) and they've never given her a pacifier and she is the happiest, most content baby I've ever seen. She sleeps fine, and you don't have to worry about screaming/crying when the pacifier gets spit out or lost as she otherwise amuses herself already. I had the pleasure of watching her a few times while Celeste needed to do some other stuff. I personally think pacifiers put way too much of a start on "oral fixations". If you teach a child that young that they always need something in their mouth, then you get the issue of other "oral fixations" later.

Honestly, and I may get jumped on for this, but when I have kids, I plan on taking my advice from my mom and grandmothers. What they did worked perfectly fine, and my sisters and I are all healthy, as are my aunt and uncles. I'd say with just go with what feels natural and seems right to you, CTs and congrats on the grandbaby!
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I have to agree. They don't need a pacifier. I raised my niece from the time she was 2 months old till just recently and I NEVER gave her a pacifier. She was just as contant and happy as ever. My nephew had one but he only got it when he wanted it, which wasnt much, he wanted his bottle more.
I personally don't see the point of a pacifier, but as it's been said, in the end its up to the parents.
 
I didn't hear of the bumper/sids thing until a couple years ago, so my kids (ages 7. 6, and 4) all had them. Like Michelle, I was neurotic about having my first one sleep on her back, and the back of her head is now flat because of it. I had positioners and my middle child slept on his side...but when he became mobile, he always slept on his stomach. My third one would always sleep on her stomach. None of mine used a pacifier for more than the first couple weeks of their lives. Lucky me! :)
Best wishes and congrats!!!! Hope everything goes smoothly for her!
 
I have had two children in the past 18mos and here's what I've learned about sleeping :) My first child I took to my family doctor (not a pediatrician) I was told to sleep him on his back and after a few months, his head was oddly shaped and I spent the next several months after that sleeping him on different sides to reshape his poor head :) It's not a physical problem but it's not pretty either. With my daughter I found a pediatrician to see if advice differed...it did. My pediatrician actually recommends sleeping infants in their car seat or bouncy chair for their first few months of life (until they can roll over) This helps shape the head nicely. It also helps prevent sids...and according to him, helps the baby's bowels move well...while I was skeptical about that last one I have to admit...I've had less constipation with my daughter than my son. I also actuall rather enjoyed her sleeping in the bouncy chair. NOW, she's old enough to sleep in her bassinet now and has more room to sprawl out. She LOVES it. She is really content to sleep on her back but does roll about and if stuck on her stomach usually throws a royal fit.

That all said, it's best in any case, NOT to sleep an infant on their stomach. If they roll there turn them back over...if you're concerned about it get an infant positioner as mentioned. It will prevent them from rolling.

On swaddling...both of my children hated it. It was really disappointing because the doctors made it out to be some "miracle cure" for fussy babies. My daughter had colic...boy could I have used a miracle on those long crying filled nights. SO, my point is not to expect that because not all babies like it and some actually hate it.

On a final note...congrats and enjoy. While a LOT has changed in the timeframe you mentioned, the basics are still the same...love...lots of love :) Is the best thing for baby...and each baby is an individual that you will have to get to know.
 
Thank you all for the information :)

Dylan Jackson was born today after 16 hours of labor! Mom and baby are doing wonderfully and I'm so in love with that little guy already.
 
We had a little mat that went in kaidens crib to keep him on his side or back. It worked well & also helps for babies with acid reflux.

we too, used the bumpres in the crib. I just made sure they were tied tight enough to the crib that kaiden couldnt wiggle under or in between them. I didnt want him hitting his head. As for swaddling, my son enjoyed it for the first few weeks of his life. It helped.

As for pacifiers, dont use them if you dont have to. My son refused them & it helped a lot. I didnt have to fight with him to give it up, we didnt have to rely on making sure it was with us everywhere we went, his teeth werent effected & most importantly his speech is great. I give that credit to not having a binky in his mouth stopping him from trying or slurring his words.

Congrats congrats!
 
I have a three year old and another one on the way. With my son I alternated him with his back and sides with a foam positioner so his head wouldn't turn flat. We used a crib bumper with no issues to 9 months when he started pulling up to stand. As for pacifiers he didn't care for it and stopped using one by 2 months old. You can put a baby on their tummy right at the start. Better to start it sooner as many tend to hate it at first they just can't sleep like that because of sids. Anyway congratulations on your new grandchild!
 
I'm with Becca-

I was against using it but after reading studies on Sids and not sleeping at night I used one. It's all personal preference. Personally, my peds had recommended them and the assoc. with speech and teeth issues were all false. I used them for the first year and honestly both my boys just wanted them at night. When they turned a year old the binkies magically disappeared. 1 night of crying without it is all it took. Now they are 4 and 5 and no mouth issues. My boys do not have oral fixations either.

What works for one will not work for another.

Congrats on your new grand baby! Enjoy this time. They grow fast! Then they become evil.
 
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